SCI Forum Reports
Childbirth, Parenting, & SCI
January 3 1995
Our discussion panel included men and women with SCI, and their spouses, who are parents.
"I had no labor pain, no autonomic dysreflexia...(childbirth) was easy for me," said Laura Baker, a new mother with paraplegia. Shannon Bloedel, who also has paraplegia and a baby girl, described hers as "a textbook delivery. There were some problems with tearing, and some concern about transfers. I went to a Foley catheter." Bloedel said she also had to figure out how to deal with her medications while breast-feeding.
Mark Roberts, who has tetraplegia and a young son, said, "I'm not able to pick him up. He's crying, you really want to console him, but you just learn to work with different things." Jerry Lorentson, whose oldest child is now 18, added, "There's still a lot of things you can do with your voice to calm them."
Clark Landis, father of a two-year-old son, said children "definitely amplify your disability, but it's totally worth it."
"One of the things you will enjoy," Lorentson said, "is that your kids learn to walk with your chair." When you feel yourself moving across the room and you don't know why, it will be your toddler giving you a push from behind, he said.
Another issue is the child's reaction to the disability, Lorentson said. "It's sort of fun to help Mom or Dad, whichever of them has the disability, when children are little, and it's easy to let them do it." As the children grow up, though, parents should reduce the demand for their assistance. "We don't want to disable our children by the fact that we're disabled. It's important for you to be a part of raising your child, but you need to give them their space."
When Steven Stiens and his wife Beth had their first child, Steven thought he would roll on her fingers "and they would get crunched. But kids are smarter than that." When the children were small, Beth dressed them in bib overalls so Steven could pick them up with one hand.
"One of the key things to remember when you're raising your children," Lorentson said, "is that you are a parent. Most of the rules don't change, even though there are a few things you're not going to be able to do."